Movie Review: Precinct 69

“Precinct 69” from Men is a fun spoof of cops and perps who get into all kinds of sexual hijinks. The movie’s tone is light and funny while also delivering hot, hardcore gay sex.

Undercover officer Theo Brady is sitting at the back of the subway car when tall, sexy ginger Kyle Connors enters with a huge half-chub bouncing freely in his sweatpants. Theo appreciates the view as Kyle stretches his beefy arms above his head. Kyle is standing too close to the doors as they close, leading to a comic predicament that he plays up with his wide-eyed expression when he realizes that he can only free his ass if he rips his pants. Theo pulls out his phone and pervs out as Kyle’s pants slide down and his cock springs out. Kyle notices the phone and tells Theo to put it away, but Theo calls Agent Felix Fox to arrest him. Felix, a curly-haired Adonis, gets there before you can say “stick ‘em up” and slaps handcuffs on Kyle, then walks him out without bothering to pull up his pants. Down at Precinct 69, Felix lets his insatiable sex drive over when he returns to the interview room to find the naughty redheaded giant on the table wearing only socks and shoes, shaking his ass. While Theo watches, Felix and Kyle swap blowjobs and then Felix fucks Kyle all over the room. Having taken it in the ass from the muscular Felix, Kyle plasters the cop’s face with a huge load that gets in his eyes. Theo runs into the room, slips, and falls. Kyle manages to escape while a temporarily blinded cop accidentally handcuffs the pervy secret agent. Now that he’s free to spring himself on the unsuspecting public’s eyeballs once again, will Kyle wind up in the ass-slammer again? Judging by his scene in “Subway Stories,” this might have led to a new fetish for the public transit flasher.

While doing some administrative work one night at the precinct, Captain Adrian Hart decides to take a break for self-pleasure. He makes sure that no one is around to see before taking out his dick and starting to stroke it. Before long, Officer Nick LA walks in on him. Nick is impressed and wants to help his captain get the “work” done, so he gladly takes Adrian’s rock-hard BBC down his throat. Caught up in the moment, Adrian pulls his curtains down by accident. Janitor Luke Truong happens to be cleaning that part of the hall, and he’s so shocked to turn and see the cop with his face buried between the captain’s ass cheeks that he falls down and knocks himself out. Nick points out the man down, but Adrian’s horniness is his highest priority now. He pulls out a dildo to warm up Nick’s ass, and then rims his hole to lube him up before sitting down so Nick can mount him. Later, Adrian stands and delivers deep, hard thrusts into Nick’s ass, showing off his phenomenally toned butt and thighs. With interludes of oral and numerous positions, this captain and cop enjoy an intense, deep session and Nick’s hole ends up thoroughly used. After jerking out his own jizz, Nick opens his mouth wide to receive Adrian’s spunk. Luke the janitor wakes up just in time to see the horny cops walking out of the office, naked.

Ty Mitchell’s husband, Johnny B., is locked up in jail. Johnny is happy to see his long-haired Latin lover on the other side of the glass, but the reunion soon turns to heartbreak as Ty taunts him with his ass and holds up an envelope full of divorce papers. Officer Paul Wagner looks on in amusement at first, but then Ty ramps up the torment for his soon-to-be ex by calling the cop over and putting on a display. Ty cruelly makes out with Paul while Johnny has to sit there and watch. Johnny sees his mean husband’s eyes bug out with delight when the horny cop pulls out his XL cock. Ty doesn’t even want any foreplay—he just bends over the desk and gets fucked doggy style. When Johnny starts throwing his chair against the glass, another cop comes in and makes him take one last look at the humiliating scene before dragging him out of the room. Ty and Paul don’t miss a beat. Only with Johnny gone does Ty take a break to suck the cop’s cock. After some mutual blowjob action, Paul sets Ty on the desk and fucks him in missionary. Ty rides Paul’s fat cock in cowboy and then finally strokes himself to completion as he rides him in reverse. On his knees, Ty takes the cop’s huge load. Now that Ty’s delivered the most heartless fuck-you to Johnny, he thanks the cop and hands him the divorce papers to deliver on his behalf.

If you’ve got a thing for dirty cops and cheeky humor, don’t miss “Precinct 69” from Men!